Hidden Dragon

Book Circle - spring 2014

Whether you can meet with us or not, I'd love to share with you the book list I have chosen for our Mighty Girls Book Circle this spring. If you have a daughter 9-11ish, jump in and read with us! You can interact with me on Facebook or email.

My list is posted on my Homeschool blog - www.homeschoolqueen.com, so hop over there and check it out!

The Homeschool Queen ironically has a distaste for princesses.

Click here for a link to my Homeschool Queen blog: Feel passionately one way or the other about princesses?

Yoga with Kids!

3 times a week, the children and I rise and meet one another in the living room or outside for morning yoga and meditation. Last Thursday, we invited other children to join us. It was so much fun! 9 children ranging from 2 to 12. The energy in the room was precious and pure.

I have a pre-teen!

Happy Birthday to Canon James Alexander.

This guy is 12!!
Canon has been such a joy in our lives. These 12 years have been a flash flood. Canon is generous, compassionate, helpful and cheerful! I am so thankful to be his mama. He teaches me everyday about kindness, justice and friendship!

Here are some snapshots of the last year in the life of this awesome fella.

Finally.

Many of you know I have been practicing yoga for about a decade now. I am so happy to share that tomorrow I start certification to become an instructor! This is a dream I have had for many moons. Finally happening.
I'd appreciate prayer! The first week is an immersion week, so I will be up to my lotus in asanas.

My new HOMESCHOOLING blog!

January marks the beginning of my third year as a homeschool mom! Hard to believe I stuck with it - as you know, I was quite the trainwreck that first year and a half!

Over the weeks and months I began to find a rhythm. And quite importantly, began to formulate a direction for my children's' learning.

My reason for starting Homeschoolqueen.com? Well, it's simple really. There are so many mommas (and dads) out there who feel inept, and lack confidence in their decision to homeschool. My task, to help encourage them that - if I can do it, anyone can!

Please check out my new site, and if you have any homeschooling friends, point them my direction!

And you can follow me on Twitter @homeschoolqueen




Ziondreamer.blogspot.com will still be my whitespace for all things family, animals, DIY and homesteading/survivalism. But homeschoolqueen.com will deal specifically with home education and parenting.

What season are you in?

In the liturgical calendar of the church, we are in the season of Epiphany: the weeks after Christmas in which the church celebrates the Light of Christ.

I appreciate the seasonal directive of the liturgic year, because it always circles my heart back around to Jesus - his birth, ministry, passion, death, resurrection, and transfiguration, and helps me stay connected to the life of the church universal.





In our personal lives, we have no such calendar dictating our seasons. The flow of circumstances, emotions and relationships is anything but predictable. However, weather personally, professionally, as a family or community - we are always in a season. Carve out time this week to take a pulse of awareness. What season are you in? Satisfaction, transition, illumination? Are you a season of growth or plateau? Discomfort, contentment, struggle, health, complacency, bliss?
Each new year brings about an expectancy for what is to come. Where are you now and where are you going? How do you balance your current circumstances with your desired choices? Share an intention with me about the seasons of your family, work, school, play, heart, health, faith, life…

We are Alexanders

"We are Alexanders, we are direct. We look people in the eye and say what we need." One family member overheard me saying this to my 8 year old. She mentioned that she has noticed this saying, "We Are Alexanders, we…" in various forms over the years, and began to interview me on the subject.

Where did you come up with the idea?

We started our Alexander axioms when Canon (now 11) was 2. I didn't want to be that mom who was constantly saying NO. I desired to parent in the positive. Speaking values and virtues over my children makes more sense to me than always negatively correcting. It is a code of conduct, whereby children begin to be aware of principles that are important in relating with family and community.

What are some other Alexander axioms?

We are Alexanders, we…
are direct.
are learners.
are leaders.
are problem solvers.
are kind.
use our words.
treat people with respect.
don't whine or complain.
tell the truth.
listen.
include everyone.

These are the main Alexander axioms. My children hear many other sayings throughout the days and weeks as well.
"We get in a rush, we get in a wreck."
"Be mindful of the needs of others."
"Yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes sir, no sir."
"You're always in my heart."
"Sometimes we need a reset."

And a couple I recently picked up from high-school-bestie-reunited:
"Swear on our love."
"Change it."

Do you have them written down anywhere?

I have always told myself I need to start documenting our family axioms. I believe that each family has a unique set of values they are passionate about. We should all record these values and speak them over our children in ways that help shape character. If we feel strongly about particular virtues, we can either assume our children will magically pick up on them, or we can clearly communicate them.

You will HUG your grandmother.

We see Nana once a year. On our 15 hour car ride, I discussed with my children the very simple 2 Rules for our time at Nana's house. One of those rules was, "You will hug Nana generously and without hesitation." The children performed this task beautifully. With glad hearts, they hugged their grandmother, both when she asked and when she did not ask.

As we traveled on, we stopped to visit friends in Dallas. My friend had a very interesting perspective on this. She recounted how her rule for her daughter is exactly the opposite.

"Do not feel obligated to hug your grandparents, great-grandparents, uncles, aunts, or any other schmuck who tries to hug you." (paraphrased liberally)

I respect this lesson in personal space and boundaries. The intentional message of "no means no" is vital for children to learn. Children need to be empowered to feel safe, and help themselves say what they need - whether it be inside or outside their own family!

We joked about the extremes of both scenarios, and agreed that there is always a middle way.

Your thoughts?

2 rules

Over the river (the Mississippi) and through the woods (Louisiana) to Grandmother's house (in Texas) we drove.

During our 15 hour car drive to Nana's house for Christmas, I announced my expectations for my children while staying at their grandmother's home. "By following these 2 simple rules, your time at Nana's house will be very enjoyable."

1. You will hug your Nana generously and without hesitation.
2. When Nana asks you to do something, you will say "yes Ma'am" and do it.

Let me splain.

1. Nana lives alone and does not get a lot of affection. She sees her other grandsons a few times a week, but besides that, moments of physical touch are few and far between.
BTW, did you know that physical touch is good for your health?

Check out this article.
And this one.

I tried to help the children understand that this is a way for them to honor and serve their grandmother, even if it means stepping out of their comfort zones to show affection to a person they see very infrequently. Forced intimacy? Perhaps. Just do it.

2. This 74 year old woman gets along quite well in her home. But there are things she has difficulty doing. So, in addition to hugging :), a way we can serve is to do whatever she asks us to do. The "yes ma'am" part of it, simply adds a pinch of respect and reminds us to perform our task with a pleasant, positive attitude.

Over the course of our 6 days at Nana's house, the children attended to these two rules beautifully. I was supremely proud of them. And I believe their grandmother was blessed by her time with them. Furthermore, I was thankful for the time in the car to de-brief. We talked about how the time was for the children and their perception of this experience. My 12, 10, 8 year old kids had a lot of great insight.

Do you have rules for your children when visiting extended family? If so, what are they?

Did you accomplish your 2013 GOALS?

One year ago seems like yesterday. I remember writing my 2013 goals and feeling determined to accomplish them.

Click here for last year's blog post.

I have to say I did pretty well with my 2013 goals, although there is always room for improvement.

I lost 10 of the 15 pounds that Tuscaloosa gave me.
I pursued people and looked for opportunities to create space for community.
I became more comfortable with homeschool, which in turn allowed me to let go and enjoy hands on activities with my peeps.

Now, onto 2014

The other night my friend was telling me about an amusing conversation with her husband. He was sharing some 2014 goals with her. When she asked, "So are these your New Year's resolutions?" He replied, "Uh no. Because I actually want to accomplish them."

For me, 2014 is going to be a focus on family, friendships, freedom and farm.

Family:
I want to continue to set down my phone and be present with my children. I am determined to spend these next few of years (pre-teen) connecting with my sidekicks in meaningful ways. I will get muddy with them, rather than documenting their muddiness and then washing it.

Friendships:
I have been intentional this past year to reconnect with friends of the past, stay connected to the friends of the now. Life is not meant to be an individual sport! Lock arms with the people you cherish.

Freedom:
I refuse to stress over schedule, expectations of others and futile first world problems. Freedom from financial worries and discontentment. Freedom to make a difference, make a move, make a change.

Farm:
We placed our 5 acre property on the market to sell. Farm continues to call to me - and to the children. We are going to find a place where we can have a horse and a herd of goats. A place where we can build fires and shoot firearms, grow food and have a pond. A place where we can be loud and have loud animals (i.e. peacocks and roosters). I will keep you updated on our progress!

Christmas Traditions: GIFTS!

How does your family do gifts?

Growing up, we always traveled cross-country to my grandparents house - - trunk FILLED with Christmas gifts. The grandparents always had a glorious tree, every square inch packed with ornaments. There were so many presents under the tree, we could hardly see the floor. On Christmas Eve, we opened presents from one another with our grandparents, prior to their party festivities. Then on Christmas morning, the children awoke to gifts from Santa and stockings filled with goodies.

In my own nuclear family, gift giving looks different. On Christmas eve, we attend a candlelight worship service (whether at home or traveling), and all our gifts are given Christmas morning. We give the children a handful of presents, and my husband prepares the best stockings ever. We leisurely spend the morning in our jammies, enjoying daddy's traditional breakfast feast of bacon/egg/cheese biscuits and pancakes.

Now that the children are getting older, gift giving is easier because gifts are much smaller than they were when the kids were little. We try to keep it simple, and focus on quality time rather than on +getting stuff+.

I will never forget the time I stood up after opening my presents, in a moment of self-importance with my hands on my hips and exclaimed, "Is that it!!??" It took my dad about 4 seconds to snatch me up and take me to the back room for a glorious whoopin. Never again did I appear remotely ungrateful for my Christmas gifts!

Christmas Traditions: Parties!

Do you host or attend a Christmas party each year?

Growing up, my grandparents hosted a huge Christmas Eve party every year with friends and extended family. Nothing can touch the memories I have of their extravagant parties. Pie after pie after pie donned the dessert table. All the adults were dressed to the 9s, and always very jubilant, funny and interactive (it's only in my adulthood that I understand it was because all wine that was served!).

The cousins would open presents around the tree around 5pm, then spend the rest of the evening playing with our new toys, eating fudge and divinity, and watching Christmas movies. Every year, we swore we would stay up late enough to catch Santa. Somehow, he always timed it just right.

Christmas morning was always just as fun. After dumping out stockings and opening our gifts from Santa, all the aunts, uncles and cousins would gather at Uncle Buck and Aunt Jean's house for eggnog and a game of pool. Uncle Buck was such a jovial character - and everyone always raved about his eggnog. The children, of course, had their own "special recipe - just for kids".

Thinking of these parties brings a smile to my face.

Christmas Traditions: The Tree

When I was young, my family lived in Colorado and New Mexico. I remember getting on the snow mobile or the horse-drawn sled (true-story) and venturing out to find a Christmas tree. My dad would chop it down with an axe, and we would shake off the snow, load it into the house, and spend time together decorating our tree. I remember that mom had ornaments that were special to her. I remember the crackle of the fire warmth of family time. I remember the scent of the tree filling the house and the sound of children's laughter.
The Christmas tree tradition for my own family looks a bit different, but the elements of simplicity, warmth and family remain a priority. We usually try to find a living tree which we can re-plant after the season is over (some years are more successful than others). We decorate with white lights and the occasional popcorn & cranberry garland. The children assist in preparing the perfect location for the tree. As we decorate, we pause to experience the texture and aroma of this coniferous beauty.

I enjoy seeing the gorgeous tree photos my friends' share during Christmas. And I would love hearing the stories of your own tree traditions.

Mighty Girls Literature Circle

In September, my daughter and I started a book circle for girls (age 9-11ish) here in Tuscaloosa. Our intention is to explore the lives and experiences of girls throughout history, both at home and abroad. Each book we read features a brave, strong overcomer who challenges us to stretch ourselves beyond what we know as people who live in Alabama, America. The fall semester was fantastic! Here is our structure:

1. We choose 6 books that the girls read and discuss during the semester. I suspected that the mamas weren't going to want to purchase many more than this!

2. The girls take two weeks to read the book, and we discuss the first half one week, and the second half the next week. This is a great system because some girls read very fast and others not so fast. Two weeks gives the not-so-fast readers enough time to get the book finished. And it is a short enough time span, so that the rapid readers don't forget what they read!

3. We meet for 2 hours. Discussion lasts for 1 hour, and then the girls explore and play for the 2nd hour. It is such a great time frame, because they work hard the first hour to sit still and stay engaged. The 2nd hour, they are free to run, climb and imagine. Mamas pick them up around noon.

4. Each semester carries a particular theme. For our first semester, we focused on girls around the world, all who faced great odds, danger and some sense of loss. We read The Breadwinner, Number the Stars, Wild Girl, Inside Out and Back Again, Esperanza Rising, and The Island of Blue Dolphins. These books opened our eyes to life around the globe - Vietnam, Mexico, Brazil, Poland, Afghanistan and the Pacific Islands. Our spring semester will bring us back to the US, focusing on the historical biographies of young heroines in America.

5. The moms are welcome to either drop-off their daughters, or stay and listen and participate.

During fall and spring, our participants are homeschool girls. But during the summer, we will add public school friends, and will incorporate the 2014 summer reading list provided by our ISD. The girls can utilize our literature circle for anything from a social interaction and discussion, to a reading portfolio for school! If you have any suggestions on how we could make our circle even better - please let me know!

Happy reading!

Hack-schooling

My kids and I watch Ted Talk vids together fairly often. I like to push them to think creatively and find mentors and heroes out there beyond Alabama, USA. We loved listening to this guy. He inspired my kids to explore how we do education. He inspired them to think about how they can take control of their own education. Take 10 minutes to watch it. You'll be inspired too!

Click here to watch the YouTube video!

Wildlife Wednesday

A single moment, capturing God's amazing creation. Found this photo the children and I took during the end of the summer. These armored beauties were coming out of every crevice! This week, I have been feeling like this guy. Sometimes I just want to curl up into a ball and silently wait for the angst to clear. Can I get a witness? Isn't it beautiful how God speaks to us? Even the smallest creature can communicate the empathy and understanding of our Creator. Child, I know how you feel. When you are ready, just unwind and keep on moving.

If we don't slow down, we will miss opportunities to connect with the wildlife around us.

My friend wears an apron.

Literally, she prepares dinner each night in an apron.

I might don a holiday apron during Thanksgiving and Christmas family gatherings, or for our neighborhood 4th of July BBQ - but who actually takes advantage of this everyday utility? Meredith does, that's who.
Tonight, I was making dinner with a glass of wine. I took a bite of my spaghetti with vodka sauce, and schlepped a splash of sauce onto my new top from The Buckle.
After washing the spot out, I took a sip of vino and I kid you not, I got a splash of wine on my top! Expletives abound.

It was tonight, that I got on Amazon.com to look for a utility apron. Thanks for the inspiration MER!!

Tell me, do you wear an apron?

For Sale By Owner

Wildlife Wednesday!

A single moment, capturing God's amazing creation. Visiting a friend for evening wine. She chirped, "Watch out! Behind you!" Had I flicked this spider off the wall, I would have interrupted this Charlottes Web miracle. This lady has a batch o babies on her back. If we don't slow down, we will miss opportunities to connect with the wildlife around us.

Fall Party

We have two parties a year. One in the Fall and one in the Spring.

This fall, our October 12th party was a benefit to raise awareness and support for 8 foster-youth in Alabama. These guys applied for and received a full scholarship to the University of Alabama. I had folks bring a gift card of any amount to share with these young men. What an encouragement it was for them!

Plus, all the children had a heck of a time.

Free Stuff!

This has been a week of FREE STUFF! My husband called yesterday and announced that he got word back from a local building materials supply co, that yes - they agreed to give us 150 cinder block bricks. 150 bricks! That saves us HUNDREDS of dollars. I quoted James 4:2b "You have not because you ask not." We laughed because we have recently gotten really good at asking!
Our previous gift: Plants. Rosmary bushes, ground cover, flowers - all from a construction site down the road who was about to doze over all the plants. We asked if we could have them. Sure! Just get them out by the end of the day because tomorrow this area will be leveled.

We were able to landscape a large area in the backyard with these beauties.











From another construction site, I procured 4 loads of topsoil. Just because I asked!

We landscaped the front beds with lirope, azaleas and yucca from around our property - transplanted them in.

Check out the adorable little potato bin my friend gave me yesterday!
And the cute hipster outfit I got from some hand-me-downs of a 14 year old boy. It works.
And Last but certainly not least: Creighton got 5 free tickets to the Bama game. We were able to take Cosmo Seth to the game for his 8th Birthday - FOR FREE! Woohoo.


Wouldn't Katy, the Non-consumer Advocate be so proud of me?
We have saved so much money this week. Perhaps I should go shopping.....

This guy is 8! If you need me, I will be under the covers sucking my thumb in fetal position

Please someone! Stop the clock! Halt time.

Cosmo Seth is such a fun, delightful, imaginative child - I just don't want him to grow up!

Happy Birthday to my awesome little guy!

Wildlife Wednesday

A single moment, capturing God's amazing creation. A Wednesday ritual. If you don't slow down, you will miss an opportunity to connect with the wildlife around you.

Dirt bath in the sun

Did you know that chickens bathe themselves in dirt? They dig little potholes and cover themselves in dry dirt or sand to clean out any mites or sitcky debris they may have on their body. It's hilarious. I like to imagine what they talk about while sun-bathing. Do they gossip? Perhaps they complain about the crappy food served here. Do they daydream of rooster-right who would one day swoop them off their feet?
When they are done, they stand up and shimmy and shake off all the dirt. They fluff up and prance off like the bell of the ball.

"Mighty Girls" book circle started today

Whitby set her alarm for 7:30 this morning to make sure that we would get everything done in preparation for our Mighty Girls book circle. Our first meeting was today and it went so well! We had 8 girls in attendance and there are others joining in next week.

The purpose of our group is essentially to reach outside of South, USA to explore the lives of other mighty girls around the country, and around the globe. To be inspired by GREAT people who risked family, reputation, and even life in order to make this world a better place. We will interact with different cultures and characters from various eras. With adolescence right around the corner, I want these girls to have strong role models, strong values, strong goals to shoot for. I want to help them SHINE!

For the first 8 weeks, our emphasis is cross cultural. Wow! You would be amazed at how many resources are out there if you just do a little digging.

We spread out blankets and pillows on the deck overlooking the creek. The temperature on this early fall morning, could not have been more perfect. The ducks quacked over to the pond to listen in.

I lined out expectations for the group.
1. Safe place to express questions, observations and dreams.
2. Approach this group as a learner, an explorer.
3. Start on time and end on time - - then stay and play and have fun.
4. The views of our literary choices do not necessarily reflect the views of the circle leader - Me (disclaimer for the mamas out there).

We are starting with The Breadwinner, by Deborah Ellis. It is the first book of 3 in a trilogy about a brave young girl in Afghanistan who made a difference in the world. While she did not choose her circumstances, she chose what she would do with the time and resources she has been given.

I would love for you to read along with us. All the 9,10,11 year olds - and me. I have great hopes of becoming a better woman, mom, and human through this group. I mean hey, I already feel like my daughter is more mature than me, so it should work out great.

Wildlife Wednesday

A single moment, capturing God's amazing creation. I met this fungi in the woods while walking the dogs this morning. It's a path I take every single day - only just noticed him today. Friends, if we don't slow down, we will miss opportunities to connect with the wildlife around us.