Grandma Sayings, MASHUP

"Mommy, Nana says that if you stare at the microwave, it will catch on fire."
~Whitby

So we all went in the kitchen to try it.

After nothing happened, I assured Whitby that what Nana probably said was, "If you put metal in the microwave, it will catch on fire." And also, "If you stare at the microwave, it will hurt your eyes."

This led to a hilarious rant for the children and I about Grandma sayings and how we might get confused if we are not really careful.

I made up a few:

If you swim 30 minutes after eating, children will starve in Africa.
If you step on a crack, you will break a mirror.
If you cross your fingers behind your back, they will stay that way.

And how about this doozie:

If you let your baby crawl under a ladder with wet hair before opening an umbrella, will you tell if it's a boy or girl, or stutter, or be struck by lightening twice? And if at first you don't succeed eating an apple a day while planting your garden on Good Friday, will you catch a cold or will it stunt your growth?