Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Bolt-ons

What are bolt-ons?

Fake boobs.

I'm thinking about fake boobs because for some reason, everywhere I turn, they are in my face (figuratively speaking).
In July, we went back to dallas for a little R&R and for some reason, I started seeing these round, bulbous beauties everywhere. I suppose it is not THAT surprising to see this trend in North Dallas - - but still I was surprised at the quantity.
That is where I learned the term "bolt-ons". My friend Michelle (who we stayed with while in Dallas) educated me on this all-to-perfect term for the fake boob.
It stuck.
I love it - just really paints a picture doesn't it? Reminds me of the Fembots of Austin Powers.

Anyhoo. Ever since I have been back to Kansas, bolt-ons seem to pop up around every corner. I notice them at Starbucks and at Target, at the Plaza and at church. My new co-worker and I were getting to know each other and he shared that his wife is a nurse for a Cosmetic Surgeon here in KC. Then he and I and about 3 others discussed the ins and outs of enhancement for about 20 minutes.

This is the kicker. As my high school friends join facebook, I confirmed an old friend today, and upon viewing her profile photo, I fell on the floor.
This girl used to be as flat as western Kansas. Now, she is the rolling hills of West Virginia. I KNOW, that there is no way that my friend could explain this away. Don't tell me you're just a late bloomer. And for sure don't tell me that your boobs just grew when you had babies! I know what's up.

The fact that my friend lives in North Dallas probably doesn't mean anything. Clearly, clearly bolt-ons exist everywhere.

Are you noticing this trend?
What area of the country do you live in?
Do you have any strong feelings about cosmetic surgery?
What's your take on it?

6 comments:

steve and randel hambrick said...

OMG. too funny. you should check out the pool in my neighborhood--- bolt on city.
i understand why people do it- society tells us we must look a certain way to be "beautiful".
i don't have a problem with it, but at least get them done to look natural!

Anonymous said...

i have no issue with bolt-ons. this is the friend, michelle from dallas speaking. i am very used to them and yes, they do look great. that said, I believe we are not given full license to exploit our assets, ie: cars, paychecks, homes, boobs. a little discretion is nice... leaving a little to the imagination is always nice and much appreciated. if you've got it, flaunt it is not exactly a Biblical principal. so, long live bolt-ons... just keep em in your shirt... please.

The Gall Family said...

You totally crack me up - that's a nicer "term" than the one we use!!!!! Why does society tell us we have to be different than how God created us??? As we had kids I started to really wonder - why God did you give__ his/her___ when there were so many to choose from - then I realized - because he alone is God. So my daughter has my feet and my son has my husband's nose and I have come to love my feet and my husband's nose more because of them.....if that's what God decided they should have then I love them too!!! (Besides, who doesn't love short fat piggies on babies - it's her teen years and sandal years I think about.) We have a few friends who have gotten bolt-ons and all the sudden we see way more skin than we ever did before....

dana said...

Yeah, the sad thing is that after getting them---they decide that everyone needs to see the new merchandise! That's what bugs me. If I were to do that--it would be for me and my husband. NOT the rest of the world!

Chelsea said...

Nik, seriously, one of our equestrian girls got bolt-ons this summer and now, she always wears long necklaces with some sort of pendant that happens to rest right in the valley of her cleavage. The pendant is definitely big and draws attention and I wonder if it isn't cold and what that would feel like sitting in the valley of one's cleavage all day long... Then again, I wonder what it would be like to have cleavage... :-)

But the really sad thing is that this girl doesn't know who the heck she is, has issues with her parents and is seeking... desperately seeking. What was it in the fake boobs that she thought would satisfy? Pray that I have opportunities to get to her heart and have real, genuine conversation. She is so precious. I hope she'll be able to trust me.

In the meantime, I have to agree with Dana. The boobies are for the hubby... no matter how big or small. :-)

Creighton Alexander said...

Oh no you didn't?

I love you just the way you are?